学不会的爱情。。。。

I love this song so much... 学不会 by 林俊杰。。。

虽然我们恋爱很多次但是我们还是学不会去真正爱一个人。。。。

所以，我们还是永远学不会~~~ :(

hi... it's 28th December 2011. My birthday just passed 2 days ago that is 26th December 2011. Finally I am 21 years old.. but I don't feel happy at all. it's not because i am getting old but it do remind me that i am still nothing even 21 years old. i am still is the person who still live in dream and not ambitious at all. what am i doing right now?? please~~ someone tell me. what am i suppose to do? i had been living for 21 year but i still do not know what i want in my life. does it sound ridiculous? yes. is it... everyone enjoying their 21 life and celebrate their 21 birthday with joyful but i just celebrated it in this stupid place and nothing special.. this is not i want. i want everyone know that today is my birthday.. and the most i want receive the wish from him but he didn't do it. how sad am i..... everyone say that when is your birthday, you may make 3 wishes..
first wishes : i want to show to the people who look down at me and think i will fail that i can be
successful.
second wishes : i hope i can success in my life.
and my third wishes is i hope i can meet my Mr Right soon. and i hope i won't get hurt again by anyone because the feeling is not good to try. :(
alright... that's all i want to write... good night everyone...

HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY TO SIUMEI..... :)
merry christmas and happy new year~~~~

i am so idiot!!!

i was been fooled by him again.... I swear I won't forgive him and I don't wish to see him again in my life!!!!!!! There are no men that can be trust~~~ i give up... :(

I am so stupid..... I am idiot..... T.T

give up on you...

It's been long time I didn't write blog. Now I still left 3 days and the half before back to my university. Time really passed so fast.. After this holiday, I need wait more 2 month that I can back home again. I really don't want back there. That place really is hell for me. Some more, I feel don't want leave him even though I know he wouldn't ask me to stay. You know what, he ask me to get back together with him. He say he feel so sorry because he leave me and all is his fault. He say this time he really will get serious with me and will love me much that he can... Should I believe him? For me now, it's really hard for me to put so much trust and faith on someone especially he was hurt me before. But from now, he just say by facebook and texting me. He never show to me that he is sincere to ask me back to him. Never.... That's mean he never understand me what I need. How I can put my trust on him anymore?? I really hope he can see this so he will understand my feeling. But I know he won't.... I think I can't trust him anymore and there is no more chances between us. I won't never trust on love anymore unless there is miracle happen in front of me... i rather love myself than anyone.. Men can't be trust!!!!!

It's quite a time I didn't write on this blog. It's probably I am too lazy to write or other reasons. Now I just started my third semester for my university life. However, I still feel so bored with this life. I can't stand with these life. I don't know why I want make myself so suffer. I found myself sometimes I really can't make any friend at here. Probably is my problem. Actually it's very hard for me to trust to one person. I don't know when the person is say true for me or when they can betray or cheat on me. Maybe because of this I hardly to trust them at all. The person that I love, he doesn't love me. Even looking on me.... Am I really too bad for you? I feel so disappointed on me. Forget it.... I don't want mention it anymore... :(

Am I am desperate right now? So what I desperate for? I guess money? Little..... But the most I desperate most for is love. I need someone to love and care me right now. In my heart, actually I need most is love and caring so much. But I will always say to others that money is most important for me in my life. I always say that I doesn't need a man in my life to take care of me because I doesn't need them. But I lie!!! I lie to everyone. I need a man in my life. I really get jealous to others that they can get a boyfriend so fast. But why is me still doesn't have a boyfriend? Is it me too choosy? I can't easily dating with others guy while I am not truly love them. I really need find a guy that really loyal and love to me forever. And I also need make sure that he is the one for me. Does that also too hard for me? When I can find him? Can you faster appear in front of me? I need you badly. That's all I want to say... now my heart more relieve after say it out. now i gotta continue my life..... :-(